Here’s a simple truth that I’m discovering, big dreams require even bigger trust. When I talk about big dreams, I’m really talking about your heart’s desires, not so much what you think you want or what you’ve been told that you should want or chase down but what you really, really, deep down in your soul desire.
Big dreams generally always come with a dose of fear, anxiety, doubt and worry and as much as I’d like to deny it, I’ve noticed it in myself. When I stop to think about it, the reason behind it is obvious, it means A LOT. Big dreams, I mean, the authentic whispers of our soul have the power to make us vulnerable because they expose our soft side to the harsh realities of life. It’s so much easier for us to put on our armour and soldier on chasing those things that we don’t really care a fig for whilst simultaneously convincing ourselves that it’s exactly what we want.
It takes guts to admit to yourself that you actually do care and you actually do want to see it materialise in your life. I’ve seen people practically pull out their claws and fangs whenever they’ve gotten close to what they want because of the amount of fear it has elicited in them. An automatic response to protect themselves from perceived threat and pain but also, unfortunately, keeping them stuck exactly where they are at.
How can you notice this at play in your life? Well firstly, you have to notice it. For me, it has been showing up a lot as “what ifs”. “What if this happens, what if that happens, what if I do, what if I say.”
As you can see, worrying isn’t very helpful at all.
The thing is that if you don’t notice it, it’ll just be there anyway, bugging you at a subconscious level, directing your thoughts, emotions, actions and body without you even realising it. So over the last few weeks, I found myself developing neck pain because my shoulders were up in my neck all the time – eeeeekkkk!!!!
I had to admit to myself that I was worried and afraid because it meant so much to me, I had to accept that I had been trying to carry the weight of it all and deal with it by myself through my own strength. But this was OK because it moved me to the next stage.
I realised that I needed YHWH in a completely new and different way than I ever needed Him before. Yes, I have been here and will likely be here again but each time is fresh because each time takes me slightly higher and deeper into leaning into Him and submitting to Him. My previous experience and knowing of Him wasn’t enough, for this season I required a fresh touch, a new anointing to go forwards into this unchartered territory that scared me so much.
My prayer was simple, “I need you, without you, I can’t do this. I need you to be everything to me, I need you to remove everything that is blocking me from moving forwards”. There was definitely more to that prayer, but hopefully, you get the picture, I realised that to move forward I needed MORE of Him.
There is truly something special and beautiful when we make those kinds of prayers, that the heart of YHWH desires so much. It reminds me of David’s words in Psalm 27:
“You have said, Seek My face [inquire for and require My presence as your vital need]. My heart says to You, Your face (Your presence), Lord, will I seek, inquire for, and require [of necessity and on the authority of Your Word].” (Psalm 27: 8, AMP)
I’m really into personal growth and development, I’ve read a lot of books, followed a lot of people that I admire and respect, embraced a lot of ideas as sound wisdom but…. when push comes to shove, deep down inside you know the only way through is through Him.
Which brings me to the next stage in the trust equation, if I can call it that.
Now, the beautiful thing about submitting to YHWH is that actually it’s not really submission in the eyes of man, it has more of a feeling of letting go, trusting, accepting, allowing which actually feels both liberating and empowering. I’ve heard plenty of people preach about submission from a place of being disobedient but with God, submission is an act of recognition of His infinite love and desire to protect and bless us.
This submission says:
“God you are Holy, good, righteous, loving, kind, faithful, worthy, there is none like you. You have plans for my good. Whatever I could desire for myself, you desire more than me, whatever I could dream for myself, you desire much more for me, whatever I could offer or do myself, you surpass me in every instrument of measurement. I submit my life to you. I submit my will, my heart, my mind, my soul, my body to you. I submit my all to you and leave my fears, my worries, my anxiety, my doubts, my dreams and my desires at your feet.”
But it is this act of trusting and knowing that YHWH is God that allows us to increase our capacity to step boldly and courageously into that we were previously trembling about. We can exist in the present instead of projecting into the future, we can start to act in ways that bring our big dreams into our reality in ways that are brighter and richer because we are no longer held captive to fear. We can take risks because we know that we are held in the palm of His hand.
What do you think?