Before the holidays I wrote a post, on how as Christians we see it as easier or even more acceptable/Godly to receive healing than to make the income you desire in your business. I received a particular response from someone who really resonated with what I was saying. She found that it was so much easier for her to believe in healing because she had seen evidence of it in her life but she found it really difficult to believe that she could build a sustainable business where she could bring in the money she desired. Feeling for her, I pointed her towards the Masterclass training that I had done on what’s really behind those fears and the details of my 100k Experiment & Confident Cash-flow Project. About two minutes later I received a blunt message with regards to how disappointed she was in me because she had seen the word hypnotherapy in my programme outline.
Whilst, I am prepared to receive a lot of kick-back over the whole hypnotherapy thing, this felt very different (please see this article and video that explains my
This experience highlighted a number of things for me:
The Self-Sabotaging Nature of Triggering
It reminded me how much our emotions can control who we are being. In this case, I was triggered by a subconscious desire to be loved and accepted by everyone around me, but this desire is both unrealistic and self-sabotaging. And I had to firmly remind myself of this until it sounded ridiculous, I mean seriously, how arrogant and unrealistic to believe that every single person in the world has to like or even agree with you?
The issue is that our subconscious beliefs aren’t just beliefs, they are rules. When you have a subconscious belief that says something like “If people get upset with me then that means that no one will love me, and I’ll be alone” then you are automatically driven to avoid, prevent and fix any and all situations that make that a possibility in your life. All this does is increase your own internal pain and agony because you continue to reject your own voice and needs and prolong not being able to level-up in your business or life because you keep being pulled back by a need to make sure that other people around you are OK. Think about it, this behaviour is self-sabotaging, you will need to keep on returning to who you are being today in order to maintain equilibrium because the new or should I say real you will rock the boat. In order to level-up, you need to be ready to deal with your own triggering, emotions, subconscious beliefs and the fall-out/consequences of doing so. I see this in so many different ways when people are trying to step up.
Values and Beliefs can Keep you Stuck
What it also made me reflect upon was the lady who shared her disappointment with me and why her words felt so forceful. Up until she saw the words hypnotherapy, she was totally tracking along with me and then
Niceness, we put a lot of store especially as Christian women on being nice and if we don’t think that someone is nice we see them as not being very godly or Christian-like. I’ve been guilty of this, I’ve seen someone call someone out for using their ideas as their own and thought to myself “well, that’s just going too far, what happened to being a good Christian? “ etc. In our minds, nice is a catch-all term which means being kind, loving, humble etc and as such becomes a major stumbling block when it comes to levelling up in biz and life because nice people put others first right? When it comes to it, we would rather be nice than successful, but who says you can’t be both?When it comes to it, we would rather be nice than successful, but who says you can't be both? Click To Tweet
The second is contentment and humility, there is so much guilt and shame heaped into this one that again it becomes really difficult to not be anything but these traits as a Christian
Who you are Being
Notice that these traits are about who you are being and there is an inherent assumption that you can only be one or the other, nice or successful, content or successful, humble or successful. Can you see the problem? In our minds being successful is the opposite of many of the values that we hold and are taught to highly esteem as Christian women, I know you’re probably having your own epiphany at the moment but honestly, I’m just scratching the surface here.
Maybe you’ve been stuck in a certain way of being because your values and beliefs don’t allow you to BE anyone else… if that’s the case, there is a lot of unfolding back that needs to be done again to get to the root and reprogramme and heal it.
If you are adamant that you DON’T want your future reality to be the result of your current ways of being then we need to do some work around that. I’d love to help you, I have two 1:1 Courage & Confidence Coaching Options, one for Women of Faith who want to transform their Lives by up-levelling WHO they are BEING and the other for Faithpreneurs who want to Create the Cash-flow they Desire by overcoming Internal Blocks that are holding the Cash-flow back. Choose your goal and contact me to get started ASAP.